The Monster Under the Bed

Yesterday I took some time to go back and read this blog from the beginning. It brought back so many thoughts and feelings. Many ups and downs and joys and sorrows. It seems that my fears about Quinn have now faded into a landscape of my mind that I no longer report to and that is a huge relief. So much of my energy in the past 6 years has been concentrated on his safety and well being and I am thankful that all is well.

Most of you know about Quinn and his journey but today I would like to tell you about my other child, Molly, and the work she is doing to reach and help young children on the autism spectrum.

Molly works at a special school in Portland, Maine called The Reach School. She took the job two days after her brother Quinns heart attack. On the day of her interview the director said she wanted Molly to meet the little boy she would be teaching. His name was Quinn. Serendipity at its best!!! Thank you Universe.

This past Halloween molly who is amazing in her talent at creative thought and art, dressed up as: The Monster Under the Bed. As her mother, I was amazed at her ingenuity in creating this persona and it served as a great revelation at the time to me and I would like to share that revelation with you here.

Around the time of Halloween, I was going through a very rough patch which I spoke about in a post a few weeks ago. This is the time I sought psychological help, acupuncture and the time I read the book Loving What Is by Byron Katie. When Molly posted the photos of herself dressed as The Monster Under the Bed, it occurred to me like a slap across the face, or a two by four to the head, that WE are our own Monster Under the Bed. Our thoughts are the monster and just like the not-real monster under the bed that we all can remember being afraid of as young children, our thoughts are no more real than the aforementioned monster. What a revelation!

To rid ourselves of the monster thoughts that we create within our troubled mind all we need to do is look at them for what they are. Remember as a child when your parent or caregiver would come to your bedside when you cried for help, "There's a monster under the bed". The parent would get down on their knees and look under the bed and say, "No monster, sweetheart. There is nothing to be afraid of" and with another kiss goodnight we would fall back to sleep. Sweet relief...no monster.

The Monster Under the bed....is not real...and neither are the negative thoughts of mind chatter that incessantly tell you that you are in some sort of harms way. You are not. The monster under the bed is YOU and YOUR thoughts and this is something you have control over once you see it for what it is. Next time you have a negative thought looping through your mind please recall the photo up above and see the smiling face of Molly. Let her loving face replace your negative thought with a giggle. She would love that.

Thank you Molly for being the bright light and teacher that you are. Thank you for reinforcing this concept for me. And please take a look at the work Molly does on behalf of pre-schoolers on the autism spectrum http://www.firstgiving.com/mollysullivan and donate some money if you feel inspired.